fallaces sunt rerum species
(via ladymarvels)
I‘m just not the hero type. Clearly.
(Source: hxcfairy, via ladymarvels)
…and then shawarma after.
(Source: melwantsalokihug, via ladymarvels)
(via thedisneyish)
Threat Level Midnight: The Office taught me that
- Stuff into jello are fun (Pilot)
- Little things can change your day when you are in love (Diversity Day)
- Some people can raise and low their colestherol at will (Health Care)
- If someone ask you to so something secret, you reply “Absolutely I Do” (The Alliance)
- You can be thrown out of a reastourant for being too drunk (The Dundies)
- There’s no such thing as an inappropriate joke (Sexual Harrasment)
- Flunkerton is a great sport (Office Olympics)
- Legally Blond is not acceptable as a desert island movie (The Fire)
- A monk and a sith lord are two very different things (Halloween)
- Sometimes, a manager needs to know he can beat up his employee (The Fight)
- Swaying and dancing are not that different after all (The Cient)
- You shouldn’t have sex with your boss (Performance Review)
- Everything can be solved with a karaoke duet (E-mail Survaillance)
- A teapot can be better than an I-pod (Christmas Party)
- You should never, ever, ever give up (Booze Cruise)
- Never step on a grill (The Injury)
- Some secret just can’t be hidden forever (The secret)
- You’ve got to take a chance on something sometimes (Boys and Girlst)
- A video montage is the best way to meet your new CEO (Valentine’s day)
- For public speaking, just trust famous dictators (Dwight’s Speech)
- In the medical world, negative means good, which makes absolutely no sense (Michael’s Birthday)
- This year, more people will use cocain than will read a book to their children (Drug Testing)
- You always choose a win-win-win (Conflict Resolution)
- Your heart can broke pretty fast (Casino Night)
- Gay porn, straight porn, is all good! (Gay Witch Hunt)
- There’s no party like a Scranton party cause a Scranton party don’t stop (The Convention)
- Sometimes you just have to hug it up, bitch (The Coup)
- You can’t get disease from a dead bird (Grief Counseling)
- Sometimess you just fail (Initiation)
- Never go to a Diwali party dressed like a cheerleader (Diwali)
- Creative introduction videos are key (The Merger)
- The worst thing about prison are the dementors (The Convict)
- A rebound can be fun, but then you are left thinking about the girl you really like. The one who broke your heart (A Benihana Christmas)
- Put a lot of attention of who are you emailng what to (Back From Vacation)
- The backseat is the safest sit in a car…maybe (Traveling Salesman)
- Hiding phones on the ceiling can end badly (The Return)
- A stripper can give you better advice than Ben Frankling (Ben Franklin)
- Stealing someone wedding is not cool (Phillys Wedding)
- It makes sense for a vampire to move to a “sylvania” (Buisness School)
- Be carefull, you could accidentally cross dressing (The Negotiation)
- Depression is not a joke! (Safety Training)
- The press will eventually come to you (Product Recall)
- A woman looks best when she is absolutely naked (Women’s Appreciation)
- Sometimes you need to take a coal walk (Beach Games)
- You always come back to where you belong (The Job)
- Rabies is a serious thing (Fun Run)
- Machines are gonna try to kill you by making you drive into a lake (Dunder Mifflin Infinity)
- Alfredo’s Pizza and Pizza by Alfredo are a very different thing (Launch Party)
- Just saying the word bancrupcy doesn’t mean anything (Money)
- Everyone can be creative (Local Ad)
- Fake mustaches are the way to go (Branch Wars)
- Celebrating birthday monthly style is a bad idea (Survivor Man)
- You can never expect to be screwed by yu girlfriend (The Deposition)
- It can be really hard to eat…at a dinner party (Dinner Party)
- It’s nice to win one (Chair Model)
- Always tell securuty guards if you are working late (Night Out)
- Sometimes you just have to…try (Job Fair)
- Not all HR people are that bad…(Goodbye Toby)
- A gas station can be the most romantic place (Weight Loss)
- There’s no such thing as immunity (Buisness Ethic)
- Baby shower are not that fun when the baby is born (Baby Shower)
- Sometimes sex has consequences. Like being robbed (Crime Aid)
- 7 hours is a long drive (Employee Transfert)
- Not going to a party has consequences (Costumer Survey)
- Sometimes it’ss ok to come back the wrong way (Buisness Trip)
- If you say you are gonna leave but then you come back than you are a liar (Frame Toby)
- Just because two people are together, doesn’t mean they have to agree on everything…(The Surplus)
- Intervention on Christmas are not funny (Maroccan Christmas)
- Sometimes a lot of hearts can be broken at once (The Duel)
- It’s not easy to be a big shark (Prince Family Paper)
- Some people really are soulmates (Stress Relief)
- Sometimes you just need closure (Lecture Circuit)
- Giving Blood can be romantic (Blood Drive)
- Be sure to separate your golden tickets (Golden Tickets)
- If you wanna wear a tuxedo for work, choose the day carefully (New Boss)
- Never give up on a dream you had since lunch (Two Weeks)
- When a person freak out, the other one needs to stay calm (Dream Team)
- Everyone should have their corner (Michael Scott Paer Company)
- Everything is appropriate on casual friday (Casual Friday)
- Cheesy is good (Cafè Disco)
- Sometimes it’s time to send in the subs…(Company Picnic)
- Be carefull with your gossip (Gossip)
- Sometimes a job is way harder than you were expecting (The Promotion)
- Good things are worth waiting for (Niagara)
- Don’t sleep with your employee’s mum (The Lover)
- It’s not nice to let people fall into a pond (Koi Pond)
- Sometimes a slap is well deserved (Double Date)
- If the dad wants to keep playing, he is actually doing that for the kids (Murder)
- Loose the twirl (Shareholders Meeting)
- Don’t make promise you can’t keep (Scott’s Tots)
- If you make Santa angry she will call her housband (Secret Santa)
- Don’t ever open a bathroom door! (Sabre)
- If you are having a baby, is better to do so at the hospital (The Delivery)
- There’s nothing wrong with using a baby to stole a desk (St. Patrick’s Day)
- We should all have a character to use on our dates (Happy Hour)
- If you kiss a woman, you should have some witness (Body Language)
- Don’t mess with people, cause things get real (The Cover-Up)
- Don’t hire your nephew (Nepotism)
- If someone treath you badly, pretty-woman their asses! (Counseling)
- Turn off your phone if you are on stage (Andy’s Play)
- Fake mustaches don’t help hiding herpes (Sex Ed)
- It’s good to be a dork (Costume Contest)
- Always put a second baby dress in the car (Christening)
- Never change the channel to check game results )Viewing party)
- Wasting time is more fun when you have work to do (Whupf.com)
- Compassion is a powerfull thing (China)
- Be carefull when you challange someone on a snow balls fight (Classy Christmas)
- Every office should have a designated sex closet (PDA)
- Sometimes the most important thing is doing something with your friends (Threat Level Midnight)
- You don’t need to throw a corpse from a rooftop to have a great proposal (Garage Sale)
- You can use your child to impress the new boss (Training Day)
- Sometimes it hurts like a motherfucker (Michael’s Last Dundies)
- Goodbyes are a bitch (Goodbye Michael)
- Don’t shot a gun in the office (Dwight K Schrute Acting Manager)
- There are no winners or losers (The List)
- Sometimes your ass needs to belong to someone else (The Incentive)
- Warehouse job is not easy (Lotto)
- Always follow the rules of your garden party guide (Garden party)
- Sometimes you just have to let people know they are heard (Doomsday)
- Some things doesn’t really matter in the end (Pam’s Replacement)
- Trying to escape an office is not easy either (Mrs California)
- The underdogs can always have their moment (Trivia)
- Also not easy? Escaping from a poll party (Pool Party)
- Having two kids under three years is not a vacation (Jury Duty)
- Florida is full of mosquitos (Special Project)
- Bug beds are very smug (After Hours)
- Presentations can be scary (Test The Store)
- Sometimes you have to try very hard to help your friends (Last Day In Florida)
- You just have to go and get the girl (Get The Girl)
- Sometimes people hide scars you just couldn’t sed (Welcome Party)
- History can repeat itself (Angry Andy)
- It’s hard to have your delicious moment (Free Family Portrait Studio)
- It sucks to be the new kids (New Guys)
- There is always some secret (Roy’s Wedding)
- Digging in the past is risky (Andy’s Ancestry)
- Pie are a very, very, VERY important thing (Work Bus)
- Some friends betray you, but some are always on your side (The Target)
- Don’t understimate the power of the Belsnickle (Deight Christmas)
- Sometimes distance is more than just miles (Costumer Loyalty)
- Where you sit, it really matters (Junior Salesman)
- You need to fight for what matters (Couples Discount)
- Life changes very fast (Moving On)
- You need to remember your past (Promos)
- A moment sometimes is worth more than a million words (Paper Airplane)
- Dreams are a weird thing. Sometimes you have to follow them, sometimes you have to give up on them (Livin The Dream)
- There is only one thing that matters at the end of the day. Love. So you just have to jump (A.A.R.M)
(via pamelabeagsley)
(Source: awkardninja47, via mercyangela)
(Source: unspoken-malevolent-whispers, via tragicallymagically)
With a small amount of initial discipline, you can create a new habit that requires little effort to maintain. Here are some tips for creating new habits and making them stick:
1. Commit to Thirty Days – Three to four weeks is all the time you need to make a habit automatic. If you can make it through the initial conditioning phase, it becomes much easier to sustain. A month is a good block of time to commit to a change since it easily fits in your calendar.
2. Make it Daily – Consistency is critical if you want to make a habit stick. If you want to start exercising, go to the gym every day for your first thirty days. Going a couple times a week will make it harder to form the habit. Activities you do once every few days are trickier to lock in as habits.3. Start Simple – Don’t try to completely change your life in one day. It is easy to get over-motivated and take on too much. If you wanted to study two hours a day, first make the habit to go for thirty minutes and build on that.
4. Remind Yourself – Around two weeks into your commitment it can be easy to forget. Place reminders to execute your habit each day or you might miss a few days. If you miss time it defeats the purpose of setting a habit to begin with.
5. Stay Consistent – The more consistent your habit the easier it will be to stick. If you want to start exercising, try going at the same time, to the same place for your thirty days. When cues like time of day, place and circumstances are the same in each case it is easier to stick.
6. Get a Buddy – Find someone who will go along with you and keep you motivated if you feel like quitting.
7. Form a Trigger – A trigger is a ritual you use right before executing your habit. If you wanted to wake up earlier, this could mean waking up in exactly the same way each morning. If you wanted to quit smoking you could practice snapping your fingers each time you felt the urge to pick up a cigarette.
8. Replace Lost Needs - If you are giving up something in your habit, make sure you are adequately replacing any needs you’ve lost. If watching television gave you a way to relax, you could take up meditation or reading as a way to replace that same need.
9. Be Imperfect – Don’t expect all your attempts to change habits to be successful immediately. It took me four independent tries before I started exercising regularly. Now I love it. Try your best, but expect a few bumps along the way.
10. Use “But” – A prominent habit changing therapist once told me this great technique for changing bad thought patterns. When you start to think negative thoughts, use the word “but” to interrupt it. “I’m no good at this, but, if I work at it I might get better later.”
11. Remove Temptation - Restructure your environment so it won’t tempt you in the first thirty days. Remove junk food from your house, cancel your cable subscription, throw out the cigarettes so you won’t need to struggle with willpower later.
12. Associate With Role Models - Spend more time with people who model the habits you want to mirror. A recent study found that having an obese friend indicated you were more likely to become fat. You become what you spend time around.
13. Run it as an Experiment - Withhold judgment until after a month has past and use it as an experiment in behavior. Experiments can’t fail, they just have different results so it will give you a different perspective on changing your habit.
14. Swish - A technique from NLP. Visualize yourself performing the bad habit. Next visualize yourself pushing aside the bad habit and performing an alternative. Finally, end that sequence with an image of yourself in a highly positive state. See yourself picking up the cigarette, see yourself putting it down and snapping your fingers, finally visualize yourself running and breathing free. Do it a few times until you automatically go through the pattern before executing the old habit.
15. Write it Down – A piece of paper with a resolution on it isn’t that important. Writing that resolution is. Writing makes your ideas more clear and focuses you on your end result.
16. Know the Benefits - Familiarize yourself with the benefits of making a change. Get books that show the benefits of regular exercise. Notice any changes in energy levels after you take on a new diet.
17. Know the Pain – You should also be aware of the consequences. Exposing yourself to realistic information about the downsides of not making a change will give you added motivation.
18. Do it For Yourself - Don’t worry about all the things you “should” have as habits. Instead tool your habits towards your goals and the things that motivate you. Weak guilt and empty resolutions aren’t enough.
(Source: getfitordie, via getting-fit-staying-fab)
(Source: lonestar6, via thisisthemakeupblog)
